Giving Matters: Nancy
Posted 2007-01-16 by Bret N. Bicoy
Giving Matters is a regular column on philanthropy by Bret Bicoy of the Marietta Community Foundation. This column was published in the Marietta Times on February 8, 2003. Nancy was ashamed of her gift. She wanted to contribute so much more, but as a senior citizen with only meager social security checks to sustain her, money was hard to come by. We all knew that, and so we didn?t want to burden her with a request for a contribution. Nancy had lived her whole life in one of the poorest neighborhoods in northeastern Wisconsin. Her home was little more than a room in a subsidized housing facility for seniors. She never married nor had children, but Nancy loved kids. She spent many an afternoon reading to the children at a newly formed family center down the street. For many of the toddlers there, it was literally the first time anyone had ever read them a book. The family center as it existed then was in an old storage room in the neighborhood school. The school district?s facilities director had determined that the insulation and airflow in the room were not suitable for storing official school records. So they let some folks in the neighborhood use it as a family center instead. Our goal was to raise three-quarters of a million dollars to purchase and renovate an old corner store into a safe place for children and families. It was early one morning when I noticed Nancy pacing in the doorway with a contribution envelope in her hand. She had just come in from the cold and was fiddling with the envelope under her coat, as if she couldn?t decide whether to expose it to the light of day. But when you work in my business for long enough, you develop a sixth sense about these things. Nancy stopped muttering to her self and finally sneaked past the kids playing in the corner and extended her hand that clutched the envelope. If this were a fairy-tale, the envelope would have opened into an enormous amount of money. But for so many of those living in the economic shadows of our community, there is no such thing as a fairy-tale. The envelope contained five dollars. So Nancy apologized. She refused to put her name on the envelope because she didn?t want anyone to know that was all she could afford to give. Unspoken in her face was the clear desire to do so much more, and shame because she just couldn?t do it. With that, Nancy hurriedly turned and walked back out the door. I happened to be there that day visiting with a very successful friend and client of our community foundation in northeastern Wisconsin. I had brought him along to learn more about the family center in the hope that he and his wife would join with us in supporting this important work. After witnessing that touching scene, my friend and client ? a captain of industry ? was left on the verge of tears. He and his wife went on to contribute nearly a quarter-million dollars toward the project. They also arranged for us to share the story of the family center with many of their friends. When the ribbons were cut and the doors were opened, we rightfully celebrated and honored my friend and client. Without question, his financial support and guidance were absolutely essential to the creation of the new family center. But lost in all the pomp and circumstance was Nancy. Her humble gift probably was more of a personal financial sacrifice than any other gift we received. Many years have passed since then, and I have yet to find a way to properly celebrate those whose gifts are modest, but whose spirit is overwhelming. But the memory of Nancy keeps me trying. So I tell her story. Mother Teresa once said, ?We can do no great things, only little things with great love.? Nancy taught me the most valuable lesson I?ve learned about giving. Generosity is a principle, not an amount.
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